The A - Z of me.

A few years ago once I'd finished school and I had left I carried on to do photography, I've always loved photography and it's something my dad loves too so it's nice to have that in common.
One of our assignments was to do an A - Z of ourselves and in a none narcissistic way it was my favourite project that we got to do.
So I thought that I'd show mine, it's a bit dusty now and I've looked through it and cringed a billion times; but hopefully you enjoy it and get to know me a little better! However I'm not going to use all the letters, just a handful of my favourite!!

Bold - The view from my old living room window of the Albert Docks *sob*. However my parents came up with this word for me, I'm told quite frequently that I'm a 'bold person' - I can be quite reserved most of the time but if I have a passion I'll really go for it! (And so should you!)

Crusifics - Religion is a massive part of my life, I've been brought up with it since day one but this is a tattoo on the back of my neck which for me symbolises that I am Agnostic.

Dark - One that even a few years later I'm still relating to, we all have our dark times in our life and I've gone through my fair share of dark patches before today and this path is just to symbolise that there is light at the end of it all.

Eccentric -  I think this word pretty much speaks for itself, I like to be eccentric and creative and think outside the box. As long as you're not throwing yourself into the river Mersey I don't see the harm.

Family - My rock.

Identity - Will we ever know who we really are? Do you ever feel like you're wearing a mask and no one understands? I know I've felt like that before.

Nurturing - I'd like to think I'm quite a nurturing person, my close friend gave me this word and I do agree, I'd enjoy having a kind heart and caring for others. (And rescuing stray cats of course)!

Vulnerable - I just really like this photo. However when I was younger I was a very vulnerable child and it's something that will stay with me through out my entire life. We're all vulnerable at times in our life and it's not something you should feel ashamed about, just something you're aware of so you can work on it.

 Weight - This photograph actually makes me feel sick that I'm putting it up on my blog, let me stress that both sides of the mirror are HEAVILY edited and it's the message the photo is trying to give that's important. But that's all I want to say for that one - Some times images speak louder than words.

Years - These are some of my photo albums that represent the 20 years of my life and before my existence. They mean a great deal to me and I feel that photos are something you should cherish forever, good memories are very precious. 

~  So there you have it; I hope this has given you a bit more 'information' about me and who I am. Whether it's through the photographs or the words. I think everybody should try and do this, even just as a as a personal project. Whether you post it online or just keep it for yourself, you'd be surprised what you think of yourself, I know I was!

Thank you for reading today's post, I hope you found it somewhat interesting and hopefully my post tomorrow is going to be my first 'Day in the life post' since I have something going on with my girlies!

Until next time my loves,
TTFN :) xxx

*Disclaimer - All these photographs are mine and have all been taken by me, either hand held or using a wireless remote. They've been taken on a Nikon D700 and edited in photoshop. Thank you*

10 tips on creating a blog

So these are just my tips on creating a blog and what seems to of worked for me. I am lucky enough to of not even had this blog a month yet but I've had 2000+ set of eyes read what I've posted and had some positive feed back so far! As much as I'd love blogging to be my full time job unfortunately it isn't, but it is my hobby and that suits me nicely :).

1. - Plan 

Make a little plan in your head or a note book or wherever is best for you and just jot some ideas down of what you'd like your blog to look like, your target audience and what you'd like to achieve from it. 

2. - Your content 

Know what you want to talk about, whether it's beauty, gaming, advice etc there's an audience for every single topic under the sun, don't just follow the lead of a successful blog, use your knowledge. 

3. - Passion 

Similar to no. 2, if you have a main passion use that to your advantage, people will be a lot more engrossed if you know what you're talking about. The amount of blogs that I've seen fail because they've just tried to copy the successful ones. You're unique, show people what you have to offer. 

4. - Name 

Short and sweet - you want your name to be something catchy that will stick in people's minds easily. 

5. - Layout 

Your layout will say a lot about your personality. Do it how you like it, by all means take inspiration but no body loves a copy cat! 

6. - Images 

I try to include an image or two in at least every post, it breaks your post down and makes it easier on the eyes. Sometimes your images will speak louder than your words. 

7. - Pressure 

Your blog is personal and no body is forcing you to write it even if they enjoy your content you don't owe it to anybody to put a post up every day or every couple of days. Quality over quantity! If your blog starts taking off, as exciting as it is don't let yourself become overwhelmed or pressured to get posts up, regular content is important but so is your sanity so do it when you're feeling comfortable. 

8. - Pride 

Even though blogging isn't my job I feel an amazing amount of pride if I post a successful entry. You want to be happy with your content. Unless it's a spontaneous blog post I keep a list on my phone of the things I hope to write about, I will usually write the post the night before and go over it before I publish it the following day. Leave time for change and improvement.

9. - Expectations 

Don't create your blog with the expectation that you're going to get 10,000 hits a day. It's going to take time for the acknowledgement to become reoccurring but trust me it's so satisfying seeing your numbers rise; if you keep on top of it and don't give up the acknowledgement you deserve will shortly follow. Use your blog as a diary something for you to enjoy rather than something you're expecting everybody else to enjoy. 

10 - HAVE FUN!!

This is your personal space, be as open or as closed off as you want. Talk about your interests or subjects close to your heart. Your blog will shine a lot of your personality so put your all into making it the best you possibly can (which I'm sure will be fantastic). Don't take things too seriously, life is too short to not have fun with the elements of your life you enjoy! 

I hope this has helped some of you and until next time my loves - 

TTFN <3

Dealing with stress

I thought that recently my blog got a little 'heavy' so to speak with it's content so I opted out of my 'Let's have a chat...' Series in order to start doing more, lack of a better word 'fun' posts whether that means I'm going to touch on my favourite beauty products or my outfit of the day - who knows, spontaneous living hey! Then it struck me that writing sed posts about these 'fun' topics became kind of stressful before it had even started, I worried my content wouldn't get appreciated as much as say a blog post which is giving some of you usuful advice or something that's a bit factual. 

I enjoy writing, I enjoy reading - my favourite kinds of blogs are the beauty and fashion ones so why was I letting it get to me so much? If you can answer that one for me I'll give you a medial. I need to be writing content I'm proud of and actually feel a sense of happiness when I upload, I'm not sure - maybe it's just a rough couple of days. I guess I see this blog as a sort of viral diary, I write what I'm thinking about and give you guys the pleasure of reading it.

So stress - something we all suffer with. There's no age that stress will stop, if anything what I've realised it grows with you and all your decisions - I've realised the best days were the childhood days and your biggest worry was whether some brat was going to get to play in the dolls house all afternoon so you couldn't. 

I think handling stress is a tricky topic, I've touched on it briefly in my 'Always Running' post and mentioned how sometimes the way I deal with stress is by running away - might I just add that is not the most ideal way to deal with stress but each to their own eh? 

I don't want this post to become depressing, I'm very emotional and fancied getting something posted, just so I could stress that it's okay to be stressed and it's how you handle yourself will cure it. Take yourself out of the situation that is making you stressed; if it's work related speak to your employee and try and figure something out together, if it's money go to your bank and see if they have any solutions for you - the simplest advice to give is to go to your loved ones and just talk. It's shocking how therapeutic it can be to just talk to somebody - you can go from feeling like you're carrying the world on your shoulders to feeling light as a feather. 

A problem shared is a problem halfed and I strongly believe that.

You're stress' aren't going to vanish over night, but you're never alone and there is always someone to help or a way to make it better. You weren't put on this earth to carry all the weight on your shoulders so don't feel like you have to. 

Something I need to practice what I preach is that the worst move you can make is to run, face everything head on and you'll thank yourself for it later on. 

Thanks for reading, until next time guys - 

TTFN 

Let's have a chat (Depression)

"Some people still think that depression is trivial and not a genuine health condition. They're wrong. Depression is a real illness with real symptoms, and it's not a sign of weakness or something you can "snap out of" by "pulling yourself together".

This is probably my hardest post to write to date, depression is such a sensitive subject to touch on.
Anything can set off depression, it can wash over you when you least expect it and it's so hard to understand, depression is a very serious illness - there are more than 350 million (aprox) who suffer from depression in a wide range of ages. 

I don't want this post to turn into a NHS self help leaflet but I do want it to give you some hope.
So you're feeling numb? You're sat in silence but inside you're screaming? No one else understands right, and nothing else matters - like one big black hole? 
I want to offer some reassurance that all them emotions are completely NORMAL more than likely each person on this earth will suffer from a form of depression at least one day in their life, it's not about comparison it's about dealing with who you are and what's going on in your current mind frame. 

I know personally that when you're depressed you become mentally and physically drained, there's no hope left and you've forgotten what happiness feels like, am I right?

HOWEVER - and it's a massive however, depression is one of the most common mental illness' that can be treated and around 80% of people make a full recovery.
My best advice to you is to kick it in the butt, go see your doctor, let them help you. Its not going to happen over night, it's going to take hard work and it will be hard sometimes to not let yourself fall back into that rut, but think of what's at the end when you're well again?
The best way to start 'recovering' is acceptance and help. You have to accept that it's become a part of you but it doesn't have to stay if you don't want it to and help is more than available - depression is so treatable, you just need to believe in yourself and you'll get through it. 

I want to keep this post short and sweet this time, I'm no expert when it comes to mental illness', I can only talk about my experience and offer some friendly advice.  

- Just remember pain is temporary and nothing will last forever. That black hole you feel like you're stuck in can be eliminated, believe in yourself and go and get the help you require and deserve. There's no shame whatsoever to having depression and you're so far from alone. Just remember that.

Until next time my loves - keep that chin of yours up. All useful links and posts from this 'series' will be at the bottom!
TTFN :) xxx

SIDE NOTE! This will be the last of my 'let's have a chat' series for a while, time for some fun blog posts I think!! If you still have any suggestions I'm more than happy to write about them - until then I hope you've enjoyed them and they've managed to help at least one of you :)! 


Useful and supportive links:
http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/depression/#.U9LBx_ldVzo
http://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/help-information/mental-health-a-z/D/depression/
http://www.depressionalliance.org/  

Let's have a chat (Self - confidence)

"Sense of worth and self - confidence come when you accept yourself as you are. Not when you're trying to be what other people expect."

Lack of self - confidence can be something you experience any time in your life, at any age. There are many different forms depending on what you're self concious about and it can effect you in simple every day life. Whether it's about your weight, height, skin tone, age - the possibilities are really endless.
Self confidence issues are a tricky one to tackle since it really is all in your head, it might of been brought on by bullying or just from your own thoughts and insecurities but it really only is you who has the power to change it.

There's a lot of pressure in today's society to be 'perfect' but really, what is perfect? I can imagine your answer to be different to mine, or to the next person you ask. There really is no definition because we all have our own set of eyes and we all see things differently. 

I have suffered from a lack of self confidence, I don't want to touch on that too much though because it's not really relevant; so what is relevant you ask?  
Its what you see in yourself, it's everything you have to offer this world - with out sounding super cringe and cliché but you actually only get one life, and do you want to spend it hiding under a rock or showing the world what you're made of?

Them people you walked past in town before who looked you up and down, do you really think they care? There are 7.046 billion people in this world and do you really want to let one insignificant person matter? 

Like I mentioned there's no real 'cure' for self confidence it really is what you see in yourself. And at the end of the day, your opinion is the only opinion that truly matters - I know that's a lot easier said than done right, but you were put on this world to make something of it, if there really is something you don't like change it. 

Appreciate who you are, you're beautiful - everybody is in their own unique way, because that's what we are we're unique and everybody has the right to be what body size they are, what height and skin tone they are. Who is anybody else to put you down? 
- Just remember if somebody has a judgement to make, it says a lot more about them than it does about yourself. Rise above it, show them, wear that crop top or that red lipstick and f***ing own it! 

There are a lot of self confidence books which you can read if you really are struggling, but tomorrow is a fresh start and I urge you to make the most of - do something you wouldn't normally do, wear something you wouldn't usually wear or you've been too afraid to try on - realistically it's only you holding yourself back.

In the wise words of my mother and probably everybody else's parent's -
"If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all".

And on that note my loves, it's been a pleasure and I hope this helps at least one of you - might not cure your confidence but it gives you something to think of and hopefully you'll take something out of it. 

Have a good weekend and I'll post on monday - all my other posts and etc. are linked below, show some love :)

Until next time guys,
TTFN! xxx

Facebook 
Twitter
Instagram: kirstie_howarth 

Useful links: 
http://www.mindtools.com/selfconf.html
http://www.wikihow.com/Build-Self-Confidence
http://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/confidence.html

Let's have a chat (Anxiety)

"Generalised anxiety disorder (GAD) - GAD is a long-term condition that causes you to feel anxious about a wide range of situations and issues, rather than one specific event.

People with GAD feel anxious most days and often struggle to remember the last time they felt relaxed. GAD can cause both psychological (mental) and physical symptoms. These vary from person to person, but can include feeling restless or worried and having trouble concentrating or sleeping."

So since my blog post yesterday did quite well and I got some positive feed back, I thought I'd make 'Let's have a chat' into an advice series. Like I mentioned yesterday I do not mean to be condescending in any way whatsoever, just see it as two friends having coffee. 

As I mentioned in my always running post (< which I've linked) that I recently got diagnosed with a series of things, severe anxiety disorder being one of them, which I now take daily medication for on the highest dose. 
But I don't want these posts to just be about me and my experience, obviously it'll be touched on but I'm here to try help you so lets get cracking...

Do you ever feel trapped? 
I'd be amazed if your answer was 'no, never in my life' - anxiety comes in all forms and it's basically a fancy word for worried/nervous. You often get that knot feeling in your stomach before an exam, interview or something similar - it's common and completely normal.

However anxiety ranges on a scale, like 1-10 and there will be people who suffer in small situations such as I've exampled ^ or there will be some people who can't leave their house because of it. Not only does it range but there are many different forms, most common is social. 

I know first hand that when you first start suffering with anxiety or when your head starts coming to the realisation that you might be suffering from symptoms you start freaking out more because it can be quite confusing and you're so unsure of what's happening, however I would just like to stress the best I can YOU'RE NOT ALONE, anxiety disorder is unbelievably common and it's one of the worst feelings in the world when you think you're alone and that no one will understand or comprehend what you're going through, but seriously there's so much help out there and you can even find it on the internet (I'll post some useful links).

Every body will go through a stage of anxiety in their life, however if yours has started to effect you daily, if it's causing you to isolate yourself or starting to make you antisocial I urge you to go see your GP. I know it's a scary thought, there's nothing worse than when that feeling or thought you've known for long time becomes real; but it might not be as bad as you're thinking it is. Part of it could always be linked to the worry of actually going to see your GP, you might even feel a sense of relief. On the other hand your GP might diagnose you with everything you already thought and you might be put on medication, there are many different types of anxiety medication but it's there to help, obviously some are stronger than others but no matter what it is or dosage, it's there for you - to help you. 
(It's very uncommon for them to give medication, they'd usually try a different strategy first) 

One of the most common feelings whilst suffering from anxiety is the thought of feeling trapped. You're not trapped in anything in this life, there's a way out of everything. If you're starting to panic in public or at a friends house just take yourself a way for a few minutes, either on your own or with a friend and breathe. Sounds like simple advice right? Just breathe. However it's the most effective, you need to reduce that heart rate that's just shot up and get your breathing back to a normal breath. Look at the sky, take in what you see around you, count to 40 sheep, or simply just sit down and close your eyes and focus on your body. You can get out of every situation, you can take yourself home or to somewhere you feel safe. That's the most important, making yourself feel safe and comfortable. 

Friends - If you're a friend to somebody who suffers from anxiety, patience and talking are going to have to become your best skills. You need to put yourself in the shoes of the person taking the panic/anxiety attack and realise that even if it's a hindrance to your day, they're struggling and they need you now more than before. Usually chatting away to the person who's suffering will help as it'll give their brain a different focus. Tell some rubbish jokes, tell them about your most recent one night stand or even what your mums cooking you for dinner, it really doesn't matter.  Reassurance is a huge key, they're not alone and you need to make sure they know that.

To end this post -  The longer you put off help the longer you're going to have to deal with it. Doctors are there for a reason, so give them that reason to do their job ;)

But on a more serious note; keep yourself safe, surround yourself by your nearest and dearest, don't feel pressured to do anything you don't want to, there's nothing to be ashamed of.

SIDE NOTE! I just wanted to say a massive thank you to anybody who's read my blog so far, it's only been live 23 days and already received thousands of views which is mind blowing! Also a massive thank you to Marcus for sorting out my domain name. 

If you have anything you'd like me to cover please feel free to let me know, I'm always open to suggestions :)

As always my loves, have a fantastic day, keep smiling and remember nothing lasts forever! 

Until next time - TTFN :) 

xxx 

Useful links:

NHS anxiety mental health disorder

http://www.nopanic.org.uk/

https://www.anxietyuk.org.uk/

My facebook: Facebook

Twitter: Tweet me

Instagram: KIRSTIE_HOWARTH

Let's have a chat (relationship)

"Intimate relationships play a central role in the overall human experience. Humans have a general desire to belong and to love, which is usually satisfied within an intimate relationship These relationships involve feelings of liking or loving one or more people, romance, physical or sexual attraction, sexual relationships, or emotional and personal support between the members. Intimate relationships allow a social network for people to form strong emotional attachments."

This post is going to be a bit of personal advice post for relationships or whatever it is you're going through right now.
I've been in two serious relationships, both ended very differently and they both had their problems. When they ended it felt like the end of the world to me, I really thought I would spend my days crying and missing them all the time. Initially it was difficult; as it would be for anybody but you do get over it. If you're going through a break up right now -

1) You're not alone, make sure you're surrounded by the people who love you and care about you

2) It does get easier, one from girl to another - it gets easier. You're going to have your 'down days' but in the grand scheme of things they really aren't worth your tears because you're going to move on anyway. 

3) It's normal to miss them and you're going to want to check your phone constantly but really you're doing yourself no favours. Preoccupy yourself, do something you've always wanted to do because at the end of the day if your phone isn't going off they're not getting in touch with you either.

So on to the main advice..  

First of - you MUST be happy, whether that's with the guy you're in a relationship with, seeing and just generally in yourself. You want to be around someone who brings out the best in you and isn't making you feel low about yourself, if you're not happy with what's going on or in yourself when you're thinking about the relationship that's a clear warning sign right there. So, are you happy?

Make sure you're appreciated, I've been in a relationship myself and known of relationships were you're just not feeling appreciated. Whether that means they're looking at other girls, comparing you, making you feel self concious - that's just not acceptable. You're perfect no matter what and any guy would be lucky enough to have the chance to see that, don't get me wrong we all have our flaws but someone you're with should love you flaws n'all. Don't feel like you constantly have to better yourself or you're not meeting their 'standards' because I promise there's a guy out there who wants to give you all his love, attention and more. Don't waste your time on someone who doesn't appreciate what they have in front of them.

If you're starting to question your relationship or something before it's even properly began it's not going to happen, you need to be 100% comfortable and committed. If you're having an instinct to leave or move on, just do it. That instinct is there for a reason. Are you feeling relieved when you're not with that person or in their company?   

Communication is key in a relationship, if you're not happy or you want something to change to try and make improvements as scary as it is, speak to them. As much as we'd all love to be no one is a mind reader, you can't expect things to change if you're not open with the other person.

Don't ever feel rushed, this personally is one of the worst feelings for me. There's absolutely no time frame on when you should be in a relationship, I find relationships always work best when you take your time, you don't need the added stress of feeling rushed or pressured by somebody. Expectations, if you've been seeing somebody even if it's going well or you've just had a fling but they might want something more or your friends are going on at you to make something more of it; never just do what is 'expected', weigh up your feelings and if you're not feeling comfortable or you're not ready or perhaps you tried and you just don't want it to go any further, that's okay!

And to wrap it up, trust. With out a doubt the single most important factor when you're involved with somebody. Trust is a very sensitive, fragile emotion and logical act, you really don't want to lose that in a relationship because you're going to start questioning everything and driving yourself insane. If the trust is gone out of your relationship, walk away - it's only time before you start being super paranoid, questioning them and yourself. You can never regain trust - especially if it's been lost through cheating, as hard as you want to try you're always going to have that voice in the back of your head.

I hope this post doesn't come across as condescending - I'm by no means an expert in relationships, just see this as some advice that I would give you if we were two friends sat drinking coffee.

Everybody deserves to be happy, respected and appreciated - trust me there's somebody who will make you feel them three things and more. There's no shame in being hurt and there's no guilt in breaking up with somebody. At the end of the day it's you who has to live with yourself so be kind to yourself and make sure you're happy!

Until next time my loves, I really do hope you can take something small from this -
TTFN :)
xxx

Tweet me!
Facebook!
Email me!

^ lets be friends :)

Keeping motivated

I find when you have a lot of spare time keeping motivated and demetermained to succeed in whatever it is you have an interest in can become hard work, especially if you're feeling low about yourself you often find yourself putting off the simple things you like doing like going for a walk round your local park or something's similar. 

I have a lot of spare time right now, I'm currently off work due to medical issues and going from working 40+ hours a week to well.. None is a massive change for somebody.

I'm not going to lie, I've had my down days where I haven't felt like doing much and I've sure as hell had my days that have been filled with boredom and I just want to get out the house. 

Back when I was in work all I did was moan about wanting to be at home or asleep and now I have all the time in the world all I do is think about wanting to be doing something with myself and my life. 

Here are some tips/advice if you're like me right now and you're not working or you can't work for whatever reason, don't let yourself go insane from doing nothing day in and day out; keeping yourself motivated and active is one of the biggest struggles I've recently found out but here's how I do it... 

I'd like to think I'm a pretty organised person, I am very forgetful though and making lists even just simple ones such as this one ^ really helps keeps me focused and when I'm unsure of what I'm doing or need to be doing I'll always check back to make sure I'm on top of everything; plus I think keeping lists is a much more efficient way to run your day.  

So, since I don't have to be up for much these days and I'm having difficulty sleeping I will usually let my body rest until it naturally wakes up, usually around 11. 

Then I have to take my medication, I don't normally forget to but I like to have it on the list just so I know it's definitely done.

I'll usually either make a smoothie and then work out or vice versa, which ever my body feels like doing. I'm going to put up a post on some smoothies I've been making recently and my work out routine is already posted - but I just like to work out every day to get the blood pumping and the body woken up, plus is it just me but when you know you've worked out you automatically feel good about yourself and motivated for the day? My routine is 7 minutes long it's hardly like you can make an excuse to miss that ;) 

Then obviously take a shower, cool down, wake yourself up some more, freshen up - I love feeling clean! 

I will usually then check my list and it's normally just full of small jobs or just things I've been meaning to do and haven't had the time to get round to yet or things that have just sprung to mind recently. Even though small jobs such as painting your nails isn't exactly the most stimulating, it's just for filling to get things done. I'm a ticker, do you like to tick your lists off? Satisfying huh! 

I will often try to get a post up every day or at least every couple of days. I took this blog up as a hobbie, something to give me a bit of focus whilst I'm off and just somewhere to express myself, and oh boy hasn't it worked a treat. Even though this blog isn't my job it definitely gives me something to think about, gives me something to look forward to and a way for me to get things across - so I urge that if you're thinking of starting one, do it! I personally will never regret it. When you have so much time on your hands taking up hobbies or voluntary work is so important I find, it gives you something to fill your days with. 

If I have plans coming up since I suffer from anxiety I usually like to pack or plan and get everything ready and sorted the day/night before, I find this helps massively. Especially because that way if you do forget something's when you're packing, you're allowing your brain time to remember them the next morning before you go. Genius I tell you! 

Finally get your butt off that sofa and out that bed! Go see your girls (or boys), see the other half or even just go for a brew with your nan. There's nothing worse than sitting in all day feeling sorry for yourself and drowning your sorrows in a cup of coffee. Socialise, you'll feel a lot better for it. Take a spontaneous day trip, what's the worse that can happen?

Hopefully some of these tips will help some of you. The biggest key when you're off work or just feeling unmotivated is to think positive - you may be bored now or feeling low but remember only you have the power to change that. Enjoy your own company and use it wisely, and once you're fed up of yourself go annoy someone else with your company ;) 

There's no shame in having no motivation, we're only human and you can't have it together all the time, however this blog post isn't giving you tips on how to run the world, anyone can make a list and stick to if you truly try, and honestly I'm sure you'll thank yourself for it :)! 

If you've managed to read this far down I'm majorly impressed and grateful, I have the tendency to go off on a tangent but I really do hope you enjoy the post and hopefully you can take something small from it. 

Until next time, 

TTFN :) 

Going with the flow

So, what do you want to do with your life? 

Don't you hate that question? I sure as hell do and the reason I do is because I haven't got the first clue. I envy those people who know where they want their life to go, what university they want to go to and their 'dream job'.

I wanted to study law, I've always had an interest in it; I wanted to be a human rights lawyer, so I started the path I needed to take to get me to where I needed to be and all of a sudden I lost interest - I still have an interest in being a lawyer but the thought of 4 years of university plus being sponsored by a firm afterwards, then actually getting a job out of it all just seemed.. Tiring to me. Some would probably say lazy, but I think if you start losing interest before you've even properly began then it's probably not for you. Don't get me wrong I'm all for determination and pushing yourself but if it just seems like a ball ache and you're having doubts about it, I'd rethink. 

- See that's the problem with today's society, everyone should go to university or you won't make anything of yourself! My secondary school drummed that in to our heads, you need this and you must have this and if you do want to make something of yourself you must go to university.. Hmm pile of bollox. 

So there I was back at square one, I'm qualified in media, SGI and photography at A level entry, and yet none of them 'subjects' even begin to entice me into a career. 

I started working full time at a bar, the pay wasn't terrible; wasn't brilliant either but it got me from A-B with some Pitt stops in between, no problem. 

However do I want to be pouring pints for the rest of my life? No thanks. Not that I think there is a 'problem' with that job or that it's beneath me, I just have no passion for being there and I'd like to think I could challenge myself into something more intellectual.

I decided the beginning of this year that I don't know where my life is going to go, I have no real set career goal in mind. There are things I do want to dabble in and I'm pretty sure I want to do journalism but for now that seems a long shot! 

Travel - that is all I have in mind at the moment, I want to see the world. I want to help the less fortunate and ride an elephant. Dip my toes in the pasific ocean and visit the Hollywood sign; climb to the top of the Empire State and go on a boat trip through Tai land! 

Big dream huh, to see the world? I think if you want something enough you'll make sure it happens, I might be stuck in a minimum wage job right now but if I work hard enough and put the hours in I will make enough money to get to where I want to be. 

I'm bored of the UK, any one else feeling that? It's time to explore, pick up a ruck sack and set off - so hopefully 2015 will be my year. I maybe lost right now but I'm hoping I'll go and find myself; far far away ;) 

So what's your dream? Are you under pressure to go to university? Are you one of those lucky ones who knows what they want and won't stop until they get it? Well if you are I'm majorly jealous! 

Until next time 

TTFN :) 

We are family

Families ey, can't live with them.. Can't live without them!

I just thought I'd dedicate a post to my family! My family can often be up the wall so to say, who's can't? But where would you be without them ey, they drive you round the bend and make you want to pull your own hair out. But that's just family right?
In the past couple of months I've needed my family a lot; they've been my rock especially my parents and my sister Danielle, I don't think I would of coped if I didn't have them there to pick me up when I fell down.

Currently I'm not at home, I left on Tuesday and haven't been back since and it really hit me at the heart how much I missed home. I've had my own place before (twice) and recently moved back in with my parents so I could save to go travelling next year, and when it come to moving back home I thought I was going to absolutely hate it - I'd had my own flat for 6 months and it was gorgeous, I was used to my own space and being so independent that in some sense I was dreading going home; at 20 years old when I receive a texts saying "What time are you going to be home?" "Are you having dinner?" "Is the kitchen clean, I'll be home soon" - they make me want to head butt a wall (ha).

However saying that; it's when I got home I realised I'd missed those texts, I'd missed waking up to a family and having lunch and dinner together. Being harassed to take my shoes upstairs and bring the cups down out of my room, when I think about it just makes me smile. I am so fortunate to have a family around me to moan and argue with, I wouldn't know what to do with out them really - plus a massive bonus of being back at home is getting my clothes washed and my bedroom hoovered (sorry mum!) - I never really liked 'chores'.

So not to pull on the old heart strings too much I guess I just wanted to dedicate this post to any member of my family who reads it and just say thank you. Thank you for annoying me, thank you for waking me up with cups of coffee, thank you for cleaning up after me, but most of all - thank you for loving me, and all my flaws I wouldn't know what I'd do with out every single one of you.

So tell me about your families, what do they do that grind your gears so much that you'd happily poke them in eye (ha).

I know this post is a bit personal to just my family members, but it's a 'happy' post and happy posts always make me smile for other people, so even if it's not the usual gossip I have to offer or me pouring my heart out about my problems I do hope you like the read never the less :)!

Until next time, TTFN!

Get your fit on

So summers here, do you have that ripped summer body yet? No, me neither!
I've never been a fanatic when it comes down to exercise, I don't think I've ever stepped into a gym nor do I ever plan to for that matter.
However I do appreciate a good body (who doesn't) so I started doing a quick, SEVEN minute workout that I can fit into any day, and even though it's only seven minutes long it's very intense and quite satisfying. So if you're like me and don't want to spend hours a day in the gym you too can simply do this workout in the comfort of your own home and you'll be fit in no time!

First off to get your body motivated and raring to go you're going to want to put some feel good tunes on, I find it always helps to work out with music on.

Lets go!
Step 1 - 30 Jumping jacks 
{10 second rest}

Step 2 -  30 second wall sit
{10 second rest}

Step 3 - 30 push ups
{10 second rest}

Step 4 - 30 crunches 
{10 second rest}

Step 5 - 30 seconds step ups 
{10 second rest}

Step 6 - 30 squats 
{10 second rest}

Step 7 - 30 Triceps dips
{10 second rest}

Step 8 - 30 second plank
{10 second rest}

Step 9 - 30 seconds high knee running in place
{10 second rest}

Step 10 - 30 lunges with rotation 
{10 second rest}

Step 11 - 30 push ups with rotation 
{10 second rest}

Step 12 - 30 second side plank with rotation 
{You're done!}

So there you have it; 12 very basic exercises that will work your whole body'. This routine is very intense and you're going to want to have a large glass of water with you for those 10 second breaks. Make sure you don't sit down once you're done, keep yourself moving or get a cold shower so those leg muscles don't lock up on you otherwise you're going to cause yourself an injury. In no way am I an expert on exercise or getting fit, I've never paid much attention to any sort of work out until this one, however it is only short and it's very manageable.
Let me know if you do try it and stick it out, any questions/tips/advice feel free to leave in the comments!

Always running

Recently I got diagonsed with some serious stuff and put on life time medication, so is this the definition of who I am now, a pyhsco who has to pop pills every day to make it through? I'd like to think not! 

I don't know about yourself but I often stress, the saying 'don't sweat the small stuff' doesn't play well with me and I sweat everything, even things as superficial as 'a cup of tea or a cup of coffee?' - big question right there I know. However even small questions such as still manage to find a way to give me a headache. 

I'm never any good at confrontation, unless I have a major point to make, I'm awful at goodbyes and even worse at decision making, so I run. 

Whenever I get stressed out or start to panic, something in my mind tells me to leave - I have no idea when this little action sprung into play, however it looks like it's here to stay (unfortunately my bank balance isn't loving it). 

So I wonder how do you handle stress? Does screaming at the top of your lungs help or maybe putting your fist through your bedroom wall? Because any advice that doesn't involve me going up and down the uk like a mad woman would be greatly appreciated. 

If I'm honest I'm not entirely too sure where this post is going, I just wanted to offer some reassurance that sometimes it's okay to be scared, and it's okay to feel trapped and like you're letting everybody down - it's a part of growing and allowing yourself to make mistakes and earn some valuable life lessons. 

I seen this post once and I live by it strongly now "No amount of guilt can change the past and no amount of anxiety can shape the future" so whenever you're feeling low or your panicking, take a second to think about it - get yourself out of the situation in the safest way possible and try not to hurt everybody around you (I seem to be a pro at that ha). 

Sorry this was such a deep and personal post but I'd like to think it sometimes good to share what's going on in your head, and if you can't say it out loud then write it down, even if nobody ever see' it, something's really aren't worth the worry because tomorrow is always a fresh start (ooooh deep right?) 

I hope this was a good read or even a little laugh at my dispense; however it feels good. 

So until next time - 

TTFN!